Setbacks Are A Part Of The Program
We went out for a 3.25 mile run and after about a mile, I began to notice problems. I was running funny and could feel it in a line from my big left toe into the deepest part of my knee. When it comes to these issues, it is hard to identify when you should just gut it out and run on through, letting things settle themselves out, and when you should stop. I didn’t stop. It didn’t feel critical. I tried to slow down and let my partner set the pace. After about a mile and a half, the pain was suddenly in the front edge of my groin, instantly a hot ball of pain. Then there was no question about stopping. I could barely walk.
Of course, these things happen at the farthest point from home. I walked through the pain, but lifting my leg was pretty unpleasant and I had to walk more and more slowly. After a while, the pain would fade for about five steps, then grow for five to be intense for a step or two and then start the cycle again. I made it home and managed not to be crippled the next day, but if I turned one way or put any stress on the leg, I felt the pain waiting in there for me.
The weather turned cold and rainy, so we took a day off. That turned into a couple of days. Then, last night, I had a horribly painful, top ten of all time painful, experience that left me lying on the bathroom floor- a new side of whatever is wrong with my digestive system. My belly was swollen out, my intestines rigid from my stomach on down. Not sure if I was going to pass out, throw up, or have something give way inside me, I was not keeping my distress a secret. I had to lay in the floor until it relented because when I’d get up, it would start all over again.
That’s when you know you have chosen a good mate, when he can be supportive through the bathroom door, but still give you privacy. When he doesn’t panic, even when you’re making some of the most terrible noises of suffering he’s ever heard. At some point in every relationship, certain barriers of decorum are breached whether any of you want them to be or not. It is impossible to share a home and never see or hear things that might offend certain sensibilities.
Today, I appear to be continuing the suffering in other ways. I’m going back on my medicine tea and J is threatening to restrict even more of my foods, although there is no way to know which one triggered the intense distress. I intend to write about how I got to this point eventually, but that is a long story.
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