Last time I wrote about grounding, a bit out of order. I definitely need that form of assistance, as I’m being launched into the heavens repeatedly by another. And I understand that you can’t play with these things without proper recovery time, rest and calming of the process, or something will eventually give. I like my brain. I’d rather not stroke out, even via ecstasy. I want to write every last sensation, describe every second of the miraculous experience I’m having, but it isn’t mine alone and it is very very personal. But two definitely have so far been able to do what one can’t, in a fashion so incredible, I still wait to wake and find it’s been another of the hyperreal dreams I used to have, afraid that I’ll never be able to touch it again.
It’s healing me. My exhaustion now is from the energy work and focus. My pains are gone and problems are faded. And I thought I was the one doing the healing.
I’ve been working bridges into my yoga practice for the past few months, very slowly, because the last time I played with them I damaged a muscle. This part of practice has always been a sticking point for me. Scoliosis in my teen years left me with more of a curve to my shoulders than is healthy and the muscles never have seemed to want to support my frame or posture. The practice fixed many of the problems, but getting that curve to reverse is an arduous task.
I’m building in time and repetitions, gaining upper body strength in the unusual places it takes to be able to support myself when I’m off the floor–a posture my brain never quite wants to accept as possible, a position which takes overcoming a small mental hurdle of fear. It still leads to an uncomfortable stretch across the front of my body as nearly all the other exercise I do causes tension and contraction of those muscles.
I’m much stronger and more steady now. I can’t see my form to judge, but I can tell by feeling my way through that it is improving. I can make more attempts, hold the posture longer, higher, make adjustments that would have been impossible before. Losing more weight is a help and doesn’t seem to be an effort. I’m not hungry and very busy. I’m shedding a pound every couple of days, still heavier than I was before, but thinner. I also have developed a sensitivity to salt.
With all that is happening otherwise, the heat in practice is raging. I have many little signs of energy flow–almost too many to mention, from burning red ears to random fiery fingers–and even more BIG signs and experiences. I’ve jumped past the point where it all starts with raw sexual energy and gone into a phase where it originates in my dantien and then travels through the major channels all on its own. I don’t feel I can credit myself for any more than laying the groundwork. Thanks to the boost, I now know exactly where the leg channels and arm channels run along my bones.
Have I mentioned that this is the most awesome experience of my life?