Vivid Reality

Total exhaustion worked for Papillon, but produced only muddied dreams and nightmares for me this week. Today, after some recovery, I had a return of some aspects of higher dreaming.

I was hired to work for a dating site, yet instead of creating stories, I was following one of the heads of the company around the town. He wouldn’t tell me what I was expected to do, so I would randomly make some notes or sketches to remind myself of interesting, possibly relevant points.

We went to an elegant restaurant. Of course I felt completely out of place. We were with a couple and they were seated at the table first. We lingered in the lobby and the older man took time to chat with me, then suddenly seemed engrossed by the conversation taking place a short distance away at the table, between the other two. He handed me my materials, an indication that I was to record something about this, but I couldn’t see anything noteworthy.

Then he left me alone in the lobby for a moment. I was curled in a large chair, working on my notes. He returned for his jacket to prepare to be seated. I noticed I was sitting atop it, wrinkling the fabric, and commented about that in a “you know me” tone. He put on his jacket as I tried to get mine off. The sleeves were incredibly tight and I fought them hard to escape. When I relented, I seemed to be alone.

A man appeared at my side and offered apologies, explaining that things wouldn’t work out between us. Since I had only a foggy idea who he might be, I was relatively unaffected by that news. What began to bother me was that I seemed to recall being rejected several times that day. It was a bit depressing.

All along, I’d been trying to fix myself up for the atmosphere. I was wearing a red bandanna and I could feel that it wasn’t on right. I couldn’t fix it without a mirror. I untied the ends and made it worse. Seeking refuge, I stood at the point where several rooms came together. I could see into the bar, the dining room, and down a couple of corridors where signs indicated restrooms may be found. I tried to walk down one of the halls, but ended up in the bar. Huh. I went back and tried again. I asked a helpful man about how to find the restroom.

I headed down one of the corridors. I paused and looked inside each of the doors. It was down this hall that I realised everything was different. I put out my hand, which is supposed to be a lucidity trigger, and felt the woodwork around the door frame. It was solid, tactile, very real. I had thoughts that were confusing reality and dreaming and was sure I was awake.

I opened the door nearest the end to find Michael Myers in the room, a young version, this time in a black hood more like the Zodiac killer would wear. This is what I get for allowing Halloween to play on the tv while I work. He faced me and I said uh-uh, nope, and closed the door, went back up the hallway.

I walked out into the night and headed on foot toward New York in the pitch black darkness. I ran sort of shuffling, in a protective manner, along the sidewalk. Wary of being attacked or mugged, I held an arm and seemingly something sharp out ahead of me. Soon I saw lights begin to appear. My New York was funny. Like a large midwestern city version. There were three story buildings with lot of neon. When one of those signs advertised Wall Street, I knew I’d arrived. Heh.

I walked past a vendor at sunrise and noticed he was selling puppets of Madam. I chuckled to myself and passed, then retraced my steps. I wanted one because she made me feel better. I slid my money through a slot to the man inside, but now the machine/storefront was filled with dollars with a lady pictured on the front.

To my left, the same lady was dancing in a shop. I went inside. It was cool and dark and had a welcoming feel. I walked along the snaking aisles and found interesting things inside. The proprietor approached and introduced himself. Said this shop was where all of the freaks went to gear up for their new lives. That sounded like just what I needed. I chose a couple of things, some sandals, not much, because I liked being unencumbered, though I thought of my camera, lost back at the restaurant with my notes.

I found some magical powders and was told they are quite powerful. It was these I purchased in quantity, filling a pouch I picked up nearby. I turned and was face to face with David Carradine, who was much shorter than I’d imagined. He was middle aged, but looked younger. As he introduced himself, I got the impression he was an undercover government agent. I was polite, but wanted nothing to do with that, and quickly walked away.

I woke as I was preparing to pay for my items and walk out onto the beach to begin my new life.

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